Domestic abuse - here to help

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If you or someone you know is in immediate danger call the Police on 999. Call 101 if you want to report something that's happened or if you want to seek advice.

What is domestic abuse?

Domestic abuse is any incident or pattern of incidents of controlling, coercive or threatening behaviour, violence or abuse between those aged 16 or over who are or have been intimate partners or family members regardless of gender or sexuality. This can include but isn't limited to, the following types of abuse:

  • psychological
  • physical
  • sexual
  • financial
  • emotional

Controlling behaviour is a range of acts designed to make a person subordinate and/or dependent by isolating them from sources of support, exploiting their resources and capacities for personal gain, depriving them of the means needed for independence, resistance and escape and regulating their everyday behaviour.

Coercive behaviour is an act or a pattern of acts of assault, threats, humiliation and intimidation or other abuse that is used to harm, punish, or frighten their victim.

This definition, which isn't a legal definition, includes so called 'honour' based violence, female genital mutilation (FGM) and forced marriage, and is clear that victims are not confined to one gender or ethnic group.

Different types of abuse

This list can help you to recognise if you, or someone you know, are in an abusive relationship.

Physical abuse may include:

  • Pushing, throwing, kicking
  • Slapping, grabbing, hitting, punching, beating, tripping, battering, bruising, choking, shaking
  • Pinching, biting
  • Holding, restraining, preventing you from leaving, locking you out of the home
  • Depriving you of sleep, food, medication
  • Breaking bones
  • Assaulting with a weapon such as a knife or gun, an household object
  • Burning
 


 

Emotional abuse may include:

  • Threatening or intimidating you to gain compliance
  • Destruction of your personal property and possessions, or threats to do so
  • Yelling or screaming, name calling, constant harassment
  • Embarrassing, making fun of you, either at home or in public
  • Saying you are worthless, excessive possessiveness, isolates you from friends and family
  • Blaming you for how they act or feel
  • Making you feel there is no way out of the relationship

Sexual abuse may include:

  • Rape
  • Sexual assault - forcing someone to participate in unwanted, unsafe, or degrading sexual activity
  • Controlling access to contraception
  • Not allowing you to express you sexuality or ridiculing your preferences
  • Sexual exploitation (such as forcing someone to look at pornography, or forcing someone to participate in pornographic film-making)
  • Using force, threats or intimidation to make you perform sexual acts

Economic or financial abuse may include:

  • Withholding money or providing you with a limited allowance
  • Stealing from you
  • Withholding physical resources such as food, clothes or necessary medications
  • Preventing you from working or keeping a job

Controlling behaviour may include:

  • Telling you what to wear, where you can go and who you can see
  • Going everywhere with you
  • Telling you when to eat, sleep, shower
  • Timing you, forcing  you to  account for your time
  • Monitoring you on social media, controlling your use of technology
 

Coercive behaviour includes:

  • Making you drop charges
  • Threatening to hurt you or someone you love
  • Intimidating you until you comply
  • Doing something to frighten you so you end up doing something you don't want to
 

Getting support

Everyone has the right to live a life free from fear, without violence, intimidation or controlling behaviour.

Support is available for people who are experiencing abuse, and also for those who recognise that they are using abusive behaviours and want to make changes

You can contact Wakefield District Domestic Abuse Service on 0800 915 1561.

Our domestic abuse leaflet is also full of helpful advice on what to do if you are in a domestic abuse situation.

Below is a list of other helpful organisations that you can contact to get help and support.

Local services

Wakefield District Domestic Abuse Service

0800 915 156

Rosalie Ryrie Foundation

01924 315 140

A voluntary sector service working with victims, children and perpetrators of domestic abuse.

Well Women Centre

01924 211114

A women's only service that provides a wide range of support and advice including counselling and group support.

Marie House

07843 344457

Good quality local refuge accommodation for women and children who need to access safe, supported accommodation due to domestic abuse.

IDAT – Integrated Domestic Abuse Team

01924 431491

Support from Kirklees Council for Kirklees residents including counselling, legal advice and refuge accommodation.

Pennine Domestic Violence Group

0800 0527 222

Support services for those experiencing domestic abuse in the Pennine region. Kirklees Asian and Black Women's Welfare Association (KABWA) are also available on the same number.

Sexual Assault Referral Centre (SARC)

0330 2233617

A police website giving information about sexual assault and where to get help in West Yorkshire.

Penny Appeal

07480 970097

A free counselling service is offered through this charity for women who have been affected by any form of domestic abuse. Call or email counselling@pennyappeal.org to find out more.

Turning Point Talking Therapies

01924 234860

A free service for people aged 18 or over who are registered with a Wakefield District GP. They provide a range of therapeutic interventions for stress, anxiety, low self-esteem and similar.

Samaritans

116 123 (free phone)

01924 377011 (Local base in Wakefield)

You can call the Samaritans about any issue, at any time, every day of the year – someone will listen and talk to you.

National services

Women's Aid and Refuge

These two key charities work together to provide the 24 hour National Domestic Violence Helpline

0808 2000 247

Both charities provide refuge accommodation throughout the country for women and children who may need to flee their homes due to domestic abuse.

The Women's Aid's children's section is The Hideout

Mankind Initiative

0182 333 4244

A confidential helpline for men who are experiencing domestic violence and abuse from female or male partners - the website provides support and information.

Men's Advice Line

0808 801 0327

A helpline for male victims of domestic abuse including forced marriage.

Karma Nirvana

0800 5999 247

A helpline for all victims and survivors of forced marriage and 'honour' based abuse.

Galop

0800 999 5428

A helpline for people identifying as LGBT+ who are experiencing domestic abuse.

National Centre for Domestic Violence

0800 970 2070 or text 60777 for a call back

Free, legal support to help protect survivors of abuse.

Domestic Violence Assist

0800 195 8699

Injunctions and court orders for domestic abuse victims.

National Stalking Helpline

0808 8020 300

Advice for anyone affected by stalking or harassment.

Victim Support

0300 303 1971 (West Yorkshire)

0808 1689 111 (National support line)

Support and information for domestic abuse victims; you don't have to be referred by the police or have a crime number.

NCPCC

0800 028 3550 (FGM helpline)

Confidential support for anyone affected by or worried about Female Genital Mutilation.

RESPECT

0808 802 40 40

The helpline is for anyone who wants to make changes to their abusive behaviour.

KOOTH

Free online support for children and young people, online counselling, supported forums and advice.

Please note this is not an exhaustive list – for further information contact atomlinsonsimpson@wakefield.gov.uk


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Contact us

Domestic abuse
0800 915 1561